Sunday, March 21, 2010

Some questions of my own...

When you are single it is so much easier to say: “Lord, have your way in me!” When it is just you, you don’t have to explain to anyone else, and not many other lives are touched in too much detail, so if you’re just following your heart in obedience, not really having a clue what you’re doing, it’s ok, as long as it’s ok with you.

When the going gets tough, it is your tough. You get to stand on the convictions of your own heart for your own life. And if someone gives you too much grief about the situation, then you just remind them how it isn’t really that much of their business (or their problem) and you can run to God reminding Him of what He said or promised to do based on what you believe He spoke to your heart. It is very much between you and the Lord.

But how does this change when people enter into a more intimate space of your life...? When that which God does in your heart starts affecting them in ways that they don’t like, and don’t understand. They might look to you for explanations or answers; ones that you don’t even have for yourself, let alone for them. It can start creating all kinds of pressure on the relationships. Now it is not just about you anymore.

Just how do you handle a situation like this?

You believe that time will tell – God will reveal His plan – but you have no clue when. All you have to go on is that He is never too early and never too late.

Ok, so now that we have the timing factor out of the way (yeah right!), we just need to figure out the “why”, right? Unfortunately for us, this is often something that is only revealed to us in hindsight. It is not an easy journey to travel...

I guess in the end the only way is to surrender the situation to Him; “raise your hands and step away from the vehicle...” After all, He is the only One who knows the details of how it is going to work out. It is just not always that easy when it is about releasing something to Him that you value that much.

I know that He is a good and loving God, and yet I found myself not wanting to give Him my ‘prize possession’. What if He takes it away from me? What if He chooses to work it out differently to what I desire? I know that He knows best and that His plans are always good and that He wants me to be happy and fulfilled, but sometimes it is hard to accept if His plans are different to ours.

Sometimes we hold on so tightly that we struggle to allow ourselves to believe that His plan might be a better one. And yet we won’t know unless we trust Him enough to show us, by allowing Him to work everything out for good.

In many ways it is indeed easier to be alone. Give me “alone”. I’m good at “alone”; well qualified, with years of experience. However, “alone” is not very fulfilling...

I still desire to share my life with someone instead...

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