Saturday, July 2, 2011

Just because you can!

This morning around 2:30am I was just about ready to strangle a dog or two!

The dogs were so restless most of the evening. I think it was the racket from a party that was on just up the road. It got the other dogs in the neighborhood all excited and I suppose it is (or can be) somewhat contagious. Who knows? Maybe the one mongrel actually understands what the other one is barking about.

Koda the watch dog is now awakening from his slumber but so far it is also quite clear that his middle name is not quite Braveheart. Not yet anyway. Maybe I should paint his face blue and
call him William Wallace. I heard someone say the other day, “Fake it till you can make it.” Implying acting like something you’re aspiring to until it becomes your reality.

So the whole evening Koda was barking – mostly from my lap, and later on from my bed. Every time when he’s had his run-around he was shivering from the cold. It just breaks my heart, considering how cold I feel, so I let him crawl in under the blanket, but to get there, of course, he very nonchalantly has to run across my face (…my neck, my head…) – just about any way he deems fit to get under the blanket that I have to hold up for him. Then he snuggles close and settles down for a bit. Finally I could also dose off. Till the next time when it started all over again.

2:30 this morning was the last time. My patience was out and the only thing I was dishing out was hidings. Finally there was some peace and quiet till a few hours later when the house woke, very unaware that I had not yet slept enough… Oh well, it would have to wait for another night.

Feeling somewhat grumpy all morning I was thinking about the bold way in which Koda feels free to approach me. He reminds me of a little toddler running and clambering onto his daddy’s lap, throwing his arms around his neck and making no apologies for it. It doesn’t even have to be elegant. Sometimes arms and legs are going everywhere and dad must just watch or get kicked in the head.

He knows he can do this because he is sure of his daddy’s love!

When you know that you are loved you feel security and you’re free to be yourself, unafraid that you’ll be loved any less for your flaws or weaknesses.

I think God wants us to feel exactly like that – his children (toddlers) - sure of their Daddy’s love. I think God wants to play and laugh, He wants to see our face light up when we get something that we really want and to see us enjoy it. He wants to be happy when we accomplish something and for us to know that He is proud of us.

He wants to share in the joys, but He also is the first one there when knees have been skinned or bones have been broken. He wants us to know that if we’re hurt or broken running to Him is precisely what we should do first! He wants to dry the tears and wrap loving arms around a broken heart and He wants to teach you something from it so that you don’t have to hurt like that again, and while He tells you that what you did was wrong or foolish (if you did), you don’t feel condemnation, but gentleness that brings remorse, repentance, forgiveness and healing.

Growing up I don’t ever remember my home being a safe place to run to when I was in trouble or hurting, but finally I had open arms to run into and a lap to jump on to and I didn’t have to apologize. I had finally come home.